Bomber's Notebook

owlturdcomix:

IT’S MID-APRIL, I’M DONE WITH THIS.

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saddeer:

zkac:

what’s Whitney Houston’s favorite type of coordination?

HAAAAAAAAAND EYEEEEEEEEEE

i hate this i hate u 

krudman:

annabellioncourt:

plz-no:

Simultaneously the worst and best movie ever made

Actually one of my teachers watched every single version of Romeo and Juliet with the original text in front of him to prove that this was the worst version, but to his great dismay its the most accurate film adaptation of it, with the lines closest to the original text and most similar stage direction and relayed emotions.

He proceeded to show it to us in class.

second gif:

Watched this in grade…9, I guess it would have been. Huh. That was over a decade ago.

zohbugg:

justamerplwithabox:

vivelafat:

prokopetz:

officialdeadparrot:

grellholmes:

elsajeni:

gunslingerannie:

justtkeepcalmm:

dean-and-his-pie:

fororchestra:

musicalmelody:

Fun Story: My director kept telling me and my tenor sax buddy to play softer. No matter what we did, it wasn’t soft enough for him. So getting frustrated, I told my buddy “Dont play this time. Just fake it” 
Our Band Director then informed us we sounded perfect. 

To my readers: “p” means quiet, “pp” means really quiet. I’ve never seen “pppp” before haha.
On the contrast, “f” means loud, and “ffff” probably means so loud you go unconscious.

I had ffff in a piece once and my conductor told me to play as loudly as physically possible without falling off my chair…

Me and my trombone buddies had “ffff” and he sat next to me and played so hard that he fell out of his chair.
The lengths we go for music.

Okay yeah so I play the bass clarinet and the amount of air you have to move and the stiffness of the reed means it only has two settings and that is loud and louder, with an optional LOUDEST that includes a 50% probability of HORRIBLE CROAKING NOISE which is the bass equivalent of the ubiquitous clarinet shriek.

One day, when I was in concert band in high school, we got a new piece handed out for the first time, and there was a strange little commotion back in the tuba section — whispering, and pointing at something in the music, and swatting at each other’s hands all shhh don’t call attention to it. And although they did attract the attention of basically everyone else in the band, they managed to avoid being noticed by the band director, who gave us a few minutes to look over our parts and then said, “All right, let’s run through it up to section A.”
And here we are, cheerfully playing along, sounding reasonably competent — but everyone, when they have the attention to spare, is keeping an eye on the tuba players. They don’t come in for the first eight measures or so, and then when they do come in, what we see is:
[stifled giggling]
[reeeeeeally deep breath]
[COLOSSAL FOGHORN NOISE]
The entire band stops dead, in the cacophonous kind of way that a band stops when it hasn’t actually been cued to stop. The band director doesn’t even say anything, just looks straight back at the tubas and makes a helpless sort of why gesture.
In unison, the tuba players defend themselves: “THERE WERE FOUR F’S.”
FFFF is not really a rational dynamic marking for any instrument, but for the love of all that is holy why would you put it in a tuba part.

This is the best band post 
Everyone else go home

Oh man, so I play trombone, and we got this piece called Florentiner Marsch by Julius Fucik, and we saw this

which is 8 fortes. We were shocked until,

that is 24 fortes who the fuck does that

Who does that?

This guy. Take a good look - that is the moustache of a man with nothing to lose.

Julius IdontgivaFucik

More like Julius Fuckit

this post just kept getting better and better

Since we’re sharing band stories, I’ll share two of the best stories I ever heard from my high school conductor, Matt. Both of these take place while he was at McGill University for I believe clarinet.
So in one of his classes, they were practising conducting. One of the tenor sax players is conducting, and he keeps telling the clarinets to be quiet. So they do. But it’s never quiet enough. Finally, Matt tells the other clarinet players to just not play. After they get through the piece, the tenor sax player goes “PERFECT!”.
Second story. Matt’s in a music appreciation class. They’re listening to some Hendrix. At the end of the piece, the recorder major in the class (who the fuck majors in recorder?) asks, “Is Mr. Hendrix a modern composer?”

zohbugg:

justamerplwithabox:

vivelafat:

prokopetz:

officialdeadparrot:

grellholmes:

elsajeni:

gunslingerannie:

justtkeepcalmm:

dean-and-his-pie:

fororchestra:

musicalmelody:

Fun Story: My director kept telling me and my tenor sax buddy to play softer. No matter what we did, it wasn’t soft enough for him. So getting frustrated, I told my buddy “Dont play this time. Just fake it” 

Our Band Director then informed us we sounded perfect. 

To my readers: “p” means quiet, “pp” means really quiet. I’ve never seen “pppp” before haha.

On the contrast, “f” means loud, and “ffff” probably means so loud you go unconscious.

I had ffff in a piece once and my conductor told me to play as loudly as physically possible without falling off my chair…

Me and my trombone buddies had “ffff” and he sat next to me and played so hard that he fell out of his chair.

The lengths we go for music.

Okay yeah so I play the bass clarinet and the amount of air you have to move and the stiffness of the reed means it only has two settings and that is loud and louder, with an optional LOUDEST that includes a 50% probability of HORRIBLE CROAKING NOISE which is the bass equivalent of the ubiquitous clarinet shriek.

One day, when I was in concert band in high school, we got a new piece handed out for the first time, and there was a strange little commotion back in the tuba section — whispering, and pointing at something in the music, and swatting at each other’s hands all shhh don’t call attention to it. And although they did attract the attention of basically everyone else in the band, they managed to avoid being noticed by the band director, who gave us a few minutes to look over our parts and then said, “All right, let’s run through it up to section A.”

And here we are, cheerfully playing along, sounding reasonably competent — but everyone, when they have the attention to spare, is keeping an eye on the tuba players. They don’t come in for the first eight measures or so, and then when they do come in, what we see is:

[stifled giggling]

[reeeeeeally deep breath]

[COLOSSAL FOGHORN NOISE]

The entire band stops dead, in the cacophonous kind of way that a band stops when it hasn’t actually been cued to stop. The band director doesn’t even say anything, just looks straight back at the tubas and makes a helpless sort of why gesture.

In unison, the tuba players defend themselves: “THERE WERE FOUR F’S.”

FFFF is not really a rational dynamic marking for any instrument, but for the love of all that is holy why would you put it in a tuba part.

This is the best band post 

Everyone else go home

Oh man, so I play trombone, and we got this piece called Florentiner Marsch by Julius Fucik, and we saw this

image

which is 8 fortes. We were shocked until,

image

that is 24 fortes who the fuck does that

Who does that?

This guy. Take a good look - that is the moustache of a man with nothing to lose.

Julius IdontgivaFucik

More like Julius Fuckit

this post just kept getting better and better

Since we’re sharing band stories, I’ll share two of the best stories I ever heard from my high school conductor, Matt. Both of these take place while he was at McGill University for I believe clarinet.

So in one of his classes, they were practising conducting. One of the tenor sax players is conducting, and he keeps telling the clarinets to be quiet. So they do. But it’s never quiet enough. Finally, Matt tells the other clarinet players to just not play. After they get through the piece, the tenor sax player goes “PERFECT!”.

Second story. Matt’s in a music appreciation class. They’re listening to some Hendrix. At the end of the piece, the recorder major in the class (who the fuck majors in recorder?) asks, “Is Mr. Hendrix a modern composer?”

ennis-the-menace:

takeme-garth:

penis-hilton:

shittier:

sofalcondone:

oH MY GOD I FORGOT THIS VIDEO EXISTED OH MY FUCKING GOD

OH MY LORD WHAT THE FUCK

image

I just want everyone to witness this at least once in their life

At first you’re like “wow good for you” and then you’re like “I spoke too soon”

Oh lord, laugh rule.

woodmeat:

pussylipgloss:

babies are so cute and dumb aww they have only like 3 skills its adorable 

talking, breathing, archery (lv26)

Fucking Munchkins.

livershit:

kramer spots an xbox

livershit:

kramer spots an xbox

<Oak>Wonderful!</Oak>

urbanclictionary:

how do people major in mathematics dont you love yourself

Because math is fun and interesting.

sweaterkittensahoy:

hugealienpie:

maureenjohnsonbooks:

Today…I’m going to call it…is the first properly beautiful spring day of the year. And in keeping with my yearly tradition, that means I play this song.

And, lo, tumblr was showered with Tom Lehrer songs. And verily, it was good.

A lovely romantic song. Highly recommend on your next date night.

Tom Lehrer: fantastic human being.

ponpekopon:

Yum! Donut Eeveelutions!

So dumb.

cracked:

[DOB on Tumblr]

Oh, Daniel.

cracked:

[DOB on Tumblr]

Oh, Daniel.

Sobering up and/or passing out. Thanks kylogram and girlprince for asking questions. Good night, all 22 of you.

whoa that sounds awesome

It is. The champagne is a wedding gift. It’s been sitting in my fridge for the last 10 months and my wife decided it should be consumed.

Hoo boy. I suspect that the anti-vaccination movement is a bit too serious for a pet peeve, so instead I’ll say people who treat folks that rely on tips like shit.

Started with champagne, moving on to Peach cider.